Chicks on Speed - Will Save Us All
(Chicks on Speed)
Loaded with attitude, Chicks on Speed are arty Euro lo-fi for the digital age. Kind of like chicks who love clubbing and
dressing up but maybe are not as rich or smooth or talented as they'd like to be. So, rather than be a half-assed
substandard version of the ideal Euro clubbing glamour girls, they become the sloppy "look at how we don't care" version.
This is, of course, a difficult trick to pull off without being too self-consciously apathetic, leaving the taste of sour grapes.
They walk the thin line that lies between satire and mimicry. However, ultimately, Chicks on Speed succeed because,
unlike the frustrated envious, they seem to be having a pretty good time.
So what about the music? Well, all this blah blah blah demonstrates that the music, really, is more enjoyable when
swallowed as part of the concept of Chicks on Speed. Remove the concept and you have, basically, a low rent, amateurish
dance combo with a lame sense of humor, like a Digital Hardcore Right Said Fred. The concept, however, makes crude
electronic music, which sounds as if it was made with Skinny Puppy's old gear, enjoyable.
For the most part, Chicks on Speed realized that their aesthetic is the strongest thing they have going for them, and play to
it. On "Little Star," incongruous sequencers are layered and removed over a crackling record sample and a bored sing-song
refrain. "For All the Boys in the World" is built upon a Depeche Mode-esque synthesized bass line, over which distorted
drums and guitar samples pop in and out of the mix, along with the Chicks chanted boys' names and a series of numbers,
the edits rough and inexact. The only full-on misstep is "Glamour Girl" which is an unlistenable disco house track, with
requisite sampled piano chord, that, seriously, would not be out of place on a Right Said Fred record. Too bad too because
it starts off with a really cool edited vocal piece, which is completely ruined (and undermined) by the straight music. It
stands out both because it's lame and because it's too smoothly polished to really fit with the Chicks on Speed aesthetic.
Chicks on Speed are like what Book of Love would have been like had they realized what a lame group they were and
decided to have a little bit of fun instead of taking themselves so damned seriously. Chicks on Speed are what Strawberry
Switchblade would have been like if they had a little more skill and had realized how stupid their songs were and decided
to have a good time instead of moping about how they had no dates. Chicks on Speed are what Blue Testament would
have been like if they had kicked out Ron, then all quit the band, then reformed with no original members, but with some
German frauleins who make their own dresses out of paper. Does that sound attractive? Then you should check it.
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